Posts Tagged ‘dog’

Obama Energy Solution: We Can Eat America’s Dogs And Then Drive Windmill Cars Powered By Our Flatulence

August 15, 2012

Obama decided to make his attack on Mitt Romney’s wind energy policy personal:

Obama Brings Back Dog-on-Roof Issue When Criticizing Romney
By Fred Lucas
August 14, 2012

(CNSNews.com) – While expressing his support for the wind industry, President Barack Obama took a veiled shot at his Republican opponent Mitt Romney for transporting his dog on the roof of his car almost 30 years ago in 1983, saying, “I know he’s had other things on his car.”

“During a speech a few months ago, Governor Romney even described his energy policy this way, I’m quoting here, ‘You can’t drive a car with a windmill on it.’ That’s what he said about wind power. ‘You can’t drive a car with a windmill on it,’” Obama told an audience in Oskaloosa, Iowa at the Nelson Pioneer Farm & Museum.

Obama went on to make an apparent reference to news stories concerning the widely reported 1983 vacation by the Romney family in which the family’s Irish sitter Seamus was placed in a carrier mounted to the rooftop for a 12-hour trip, with three stops. The Boston Globe first reported the matter in 2007.

“Now I don’t know if he’s actually tried that,” Obama said of Romney attaching a windmill to the car. “I know he’s had other things on his car. But, if he wants to learn something about wind, all he’s got to do is pay attention to what you’ve been doing here in Iowa.”

Obama also said, “The wind industry now supports 7,000 jobs here in Iowa, 75,000 jobs across the country. These jobs aren’t a fad. These are good jobs and they’re a source of pride we need to fight for.”

At a Romney campaign rally in Zanesville, Ohio on March 5, Romney criticized Obama on energy.

“What is his energy policy? It’s apparently to make it hard to get coal out of the ground with more regulations, makes it harder to get the gas out of the ground,” Romney said. “And as a result, while he’s happy with wind and solar – we all like wind and solar – but you can’t drive a car with a windmill on it. My plan is that we’re finally going to get America energy secure by taking advantage of our coal, our oil, our gas, and bringing in that Keystone pipeline from Canada.”

In April, dogs became more of an issue when additional news stories pointed out that in Obama’s autobiography, Dreams of My Father: A Story of Race and Inheritance, Obama discloses that he once ate dog meat as a child in Indonesia. Obama even joked about it at the White House Correspondents Association Dinner.

It’s frankly amazing that this cheap-shot artist Chicago thug is actually our president.

What’s good for the dog-eater ought to be good for the guy who once put his doggy carrier on the roof of his car, however.

You want to bring up Romney’s dog (who LIVED, by the way) in your attack on his energy policy?

Well, America, EAT your damn dog like Barry Hussein did and stick a propeller out of your butt to take advantage of your “natural gas.”

For the record, my own dog has repeatedly testified that she would rather be on Mitt Romney’s roof than digesting inside Barack Obama’s gut.  My dog also says that she would cause as much gastrointestinal distress to our first dog-eating president in history if he ate her – such that he’d get arrested for uncontrollable speeding in his windmill fartmobile.  And my dog says to vote for the guy who DIDN’T eat a dog.

And for the record, the green energy boondoggle that Obama keeps demanding for America hasn’t worked particularly well for Spain – a country that now “enjoys” 25% unemployment with young adults “enjoying” 53% unemployment.  The thing is, of course, that stupid rots the brain and goes into the bones.  And so this election is the harbinger for whether America wants to “enjoy” a Spain-style economy – and remember, Spain was once the mightiest nation on the planet, too – or whether we want to actually quit digging our hole deeper and start climbing out of it with Mitt Romney.

One way or another, if Obama gets re-elected, we’ll be doing something crazy to live in a world where Obama criminalized oil.  Will it be Obama’s windmill fartmobile or a Fred Flintstone car, I don’t know.  But it won’t be much longer before whatever it is – joke though it may be – won’t be funny.

Nancy Pelosi has some exciting models out.

Dachshund X Labrador = Dachsador!

July 29, 2012

Years back there was a car called the Chevy Vega.  It had a nice looking body, but was built with a gutless, underpowered, cheap engine.  What could have been a real nice car and even a bold step in the direction toward smaller and more fuel efficient cars that history shows that GM needed to go in was instead one of the worst cars in the history of GM.

Until the cars started ending up on the trash heap and kids started putting 350 V-8s under the hood.  What you ended up with was a subcompact car with muscle car oomph.

The same principle was carried out more professionally with the Shelby Cobra: you take a little car body and cram a 427 inch Corvette RAT engine in it and you get something special.

Heck, it works great with cars; why not try it with dogs?

There are all kinds of breeds of dogs out there, of course.  And then when you add in the fact that dogs have a way of ignoring the rules and creating their own breeds of “mutts,” well, it truly takes all kinds to make up a world.

I’m here to talk about what happens when you take a “big block Labrador” and put it into a “compact Dachshund body.”  You get this:

Aint she pretty?

I love dogs, and have always found them to be incredibly beautiful creatures to go along with the fact that they are world-class athletes.  If dogs were allowed to compete in the Olympics, they’d end up with pretty much all of the medals for pretty much all of the track and field and swimming events.

I’ve always particularly loved the big dog breeds, such as the Rottweilers that I’ve had.  There is simply nothing like watching a big dog running with the big dogs.

But this 42 lb Dachshund-Labrador mix has truly opened my eyes to the middleweight class of dogdom.  In the case of this one, she’s basically an “atomic Dachshund,” complete with webbed feet like a Lab, a weight that’s right near the middle between a 20 lb Dachshund and a 60 lb Labrador Retriever female, and legs that are about twice as long as a Dachshund’s but about 3/4s as long as a Labrador’s.

This is a dog that might have happened “by accident,” or might have been the result of “designer breeding.”  When I finally figured out what my little darling was, I discovered that “Dachsadors” are a designer breed.  You’ll have to “ask an expert” how you breed a Dachshund with a Labrador.  And if you find out, please tell me so I can finally have an answer for all the people who have asked me just that very question.

She is a high-speed, low-drag low-earth orbiting ballistic missile system when she’s in full-pursuit of a rabbit or squirrel.  And this is a dog that has now caught a jackrabbit – and believe me that aint exactly easy! – in addition to a few cottontails (it turns out neither rabbit species particularly like to be caught and literally SCREAM until I make her put them down).  She’s got a combination of speed and agility that has to be seen to be believed.  I call it torque; she’s got those powerful leg muscles and that short running stroke to get going fast REAL quick.  It is not unusual at all to see her run with both sets of legs parallel to the ground at the same time.  It’s almost like she’s flying, and all she needs is a little superdog cape:

She’s a very athletic thing that loves to jump as much as she loves to just plain flat-out haul ass:

I often just find myself simply admiring her exquisite musculature and shape:

I find her to be a beautifully muscled and beautifully proportioned dog.  I love watching her trot along so easily and gracefully with her beautiful wheaton coat gliding over her ribs and muscles:

And of course she has been since the day we brought her home as a little puppy:

She’s just been a tremendous little dog, and I love her dearly.

A few extra details about her:

She is without question the most joyful dog I have ever been around.  She will wag her tail if you just LOOK at her.  She loves to play and can keep herself quite entertained by throwing one of her toys into the air and catching it.  And frequently she’ll just get a little bee in her bonnet and start racing through the house at top speed with a happy-to-be-alive gleam in her eyes.  She’s got a few different courses to race on.  And the more I laugh the more she runs.  When I adopted her, she was a nearly 10 week-old puppy in a glass cage at a shelter, and had been in the cage for close to 2 weeks.  When she was introduced to her back yard she ran like a happy little fool and just never really got over her love of running.

She is also the most remarkable dog I’ve ever seen in remembering where things were and any kind of change.  If anything in the house gets moved for any reason, she KNOWS about it and zeroes right in on it.  If she’s out in the desert and something new got blown or placed or built or dumped anywhere near her domain, she is instantly aware of it.

And she likes to watch TV more than any dog I’ve ever heard of – especially if there are animals on.  I’ve had on the Westminster dog show and she has watched enraptured for a good half hour straight.  When one of her “shows” comes on in the form of a commercial, she recognizes it by the music jingle and looks up on cue just when the dogs appear.  She will wag her tail at certain times, perk her ears at certain moments, etc.  She loves to watch horses, but is quite interested in just about anything that has just about any kind of animal.

When I got her and figured out what she was (the shelter labeled her as “a red and white hound mix”), I discovered that people were intentionally breeding these “Dachsadors.”  You can easily understand why when you think about it.  Labradors are and have been THE most popular breed of dog by AKC registration because of their many fine qualities.  Dachshunds have been slipping, going from as high as the fourth most registered breed of dog in 2004 to the sixth most in 2006, to the eighth most in 2010 and the ninth most last year.  But obviously a lot of people see a lot of positive traits in both breeds of dog.

So why not put them together?  What you end up with is a medium-sized dog of excellent temperament and intelligence.  And if you really want a Labrador Retriever but can’t have a dog that large, well, why not shrink it down?

The people who know dogs that look at my little darling see a Labrador face from the front and a Dachshund face from the side.  And I always enjoy being around dog lovers who will come over and tell me they’ve never seen anything like her, and how beautiful she is and what a great shape she has.

I’m glad she’s female because while my Rottweilers were “macho dogs,” this one is definitely “daddy’s little girl.”

P.S. I mentioned that I’m a Rottweiler lover.  It’s amazing how different dogs can be and how wonderful they are at being the incredible things they were bred to be.  My last Rottweiler was HUGE by Rottweiler standards – standing nearly 32″ at the shoulder (in the realm of Great Dane height!), weighing in at nearly 200 lbs, and standing about 6’6″ on his hind legs (I’m 6’2″ and he could jump up with his front paws over my shoulder and look me right in the eye – and he was leaning at an angle).  He was the product of very large parents which led to a 3-puppy litter that allowed him to get as big as the genes from already large parents would allow him to get.  He was incredibly smart and impossibly strong.  That dog could easily knock a big, strong man down and that man wouldn’t get up unless and until that Rott wanted to let him get up.  Before him, we had two brothers who were what we called “muttweilers” being the result of a purebred female and the neighbor’s 3/4 Rott-1/4 German Shepherd who jumped the fence.  I used to go backpacking in the Willamette National Forest and reuglarly went on 3 day outings.  I would hike from 10-15 miles a day, depending on the leg, while the dogs chased each other off the leash.  I kid you not, those dogs would run at least 150 miles a day each of the three days.  No human being who ever lived could have begun to do what those dogs did EASILY.  One year I took one of them to visit my parents and my father and I went hiking.  That dog loved to walk ahead, but he didn’t know which way we would go at one point where the trail split.  And when my dad took the uphill path, the only way the dog could get ahead of him was to jump up a rocky outcropping that we figured was easily 8′ high.  That Rottweiler mix took one step back and MADE that jump; at the very top he had to pull himself up with his front legs with an effort my dad found as amazing as the jump itself.

Dogs are just amazing, aren’t they?  And the only thing they do better than their many amazing feats of speed, agility, leaping, strength, endurance, etc., etc., is be the best companions in the world.

Hope you enjoyed my show-and-tell about my dog!

Forget The Free World; Forget America: Barack Obama Can’t Even Govern His Own DOG

May 6, 2010

There are metaphors, and then there are metaphors.  This is definitely a defining statement of the Obama presidency:

“I’m going to kill that fucking dog.”

-Another gem from Emanuel who was pissed that Obama’s dog, Bo, was dropping turds in the White House, taking up presidential time in cleanups.

Does this tell us that Barry Hussein’s chief of staff is a loathsome, vile turd who should have been the very first piece of crap picked up off the carpet and flushed down the toilet?  Of course he is.  But there’s more to say about this sad saga.

Forget about Iran going nuclear; forget about our shockingly high unemployment; forget about dealing with the fact that the entire Gulf of Mexico is starting to look like the White House carpet after Bo crapped all over it: Barack Obama can’t even successfully preside over the house-training of his own dog.

And, yes.  What Bo is doing to the White House carpeting, his master is doing to the country.

Maybe I should be the president.  I had my Rottweiler puppy housebroken in under a week, and I have no doubt that he had more backtalk and sass attitude in him than Ahmadinejad (another loathsome little turd, by the way) can ever hope to have.