Posts Tagged ‘good news/bad news jokes’

ObamaCare As The Greatest ‘Good News/Bad News’ Joke In Human History

November 12, 2013

I’ve got a joke for you:

Doctor:

I have some good news and I have some bad news.

Patient: 

What’s the good news?

Doctor: 

The good news is that the tests you took showed that you have 24 hours to live.

Patient:

That’s the good news?  What’s the bad news?

Doctor:

The bad news is that  I forgot to call you yesterday!

Here’s another one:

Doctor:

I have some good news and some bad news.

Patient:

What’s the good news?

Doctor:

The good news is they are naming a disease after you!

Yep, ObamaCare is one of those “good news/bad news” jokes.  They named a disease after Obama, too, you know: the fatal disease to the U.S. health care system and ultimately the U.S. economy otherwise known as “ObamaCare.”

The GOOD news is that nearly 50,000 people enrolled in ObamaCare through last week.  Now, keep in mind, Obama predicted that 500,000 would enroll and his forecast was off by about ninety percent.  That’s a number that wouldn’t fill an average football stadium out of a nation of nearly 330 million people.  But we have to consider the 50,000 figure as “good news” given the other enormous whammy that’s coming that is very clearly “the bad news.”

The BAD news is that nearly 5 MILLION people have already lost their health insurance due to ObamaCare.

Which is to say that for every person who just got health care because of ObamaCare, one hundred just lost their health care because of ObamaCare.

The official goal of ObamaCare, they told us, was to insure the uninsured.  The actual result of ObamaCare was to uninsured the insured.

But you really aint seen nothin’ yet about this mother of all good news/bad news jokes.  Because that 50,000 number is very likely grossly inflated (insurance companies are reporting that there are all kinds of multiple enrollments as people hit the “buy” key repeatedly due to the colossal failure of the $600 ObamaCare website).  And because that 5 million figure is grossly underrepresented.

A Duke University health expert released his finding that 129 million Americans will essentially lose their health plans and either get cancelled altogether “because they [will have] already have lost or will lose that coverage by the end of 2014.”

That number, for what it’s worth, represents 68% of he 189 million Americans who have – well, who USED to have – health insurance before the ObamaCare wrecking ball “bad news” part of he joke hit America.

For 129 million Americans – and again, for the nearly 70 percent of Americans who “were satisfied with their health plans” before Obama ruined the world – OBAMA’S PROMISE THAT HE MADE OVER AND OVER (AT LEAST 36 TIMES!!!) WAS A SHOCKING LIE.

Obama said, “If you’re happy with what you’ve got, nobody’s changing it.” He said, “No matter how we reform health care, we will keep this promise: If you like your doctor, you will be able to keep your doctor. Period. If you like your health care plan, you will be able to keep your health care plan. Period. No one will take it away. No matter what.”

That last one was featured in the reliably leftist Washington Post fact check that gave Obama the maximum number of “liar points” possible.  Nixon’s “I am not a crook” statement couldn’t have been a bigger lie than Obama’s “you can keep your health care plan.”  And Nixon’s lie didn’t hurt anybody unlike Obama’s.  People on the verge of dying of cancer just found out that they lost their health plans because of Obama’s lie.  And because of Obama’s criminal incompetence, those people can’t buy insurance to save their lives because the $600 million website won’t work the way any one of all the millions of porn sites on the internet all do.

Obama told America that over and over and over again as he was selling his “signature legislative accomplishment” that barely passed after all kinds of Democrat shenanigans without a single Republican willing to vote for that demonic bill.

And he lied without shame, because he is a man without shame, without honor, without integrity, without decency and without virtue of any kind.

Liberals are truly radical ideologues who – like their Marxist forebears – are determined to ignore reality as they impose their ideology onto the world.  They insist that all evidence and facts aside, their messiah couldn’t have “lied.”  Nope.  He “misspoke” at worst.

David Lazarus is such a leftist ideologue who writes an opinion piece that the Los Angeles Times smuggles into its business news section every week.  Liberal Lazarus is forced to acknowledge a couple of huge facts:

President Obama apologized last week to people whose health insurance was canceled despite his repeated assurances that if you like your policy, it won’t change.

The charitable way of putting it is that Obama oversold details of the healthcare-reform law in his speeches.

His critics say he flat-out lied.

This wouldn’t even be an issue if Obama had qualified his remarks simply by adding that you’d be able to keep your insurance as long as it meets minimum standards for coverage, which is a big part of what Obamacare is all about.

Here’s the thing, though: The rules of the road for healthcare reform have been — and remain — a moving target. For months, not even insurers have known what their requirements would be.

Number one, you can’t demonize the insurance companies for this fiasco, because they had no idea what the incredibly secretive White House was up to while they added another EIGHTEEN THOUSAND PAGES OF REGULATIONS to the 2,000 pages of ObamaCare that nobody read to begin with.

The crime of the insurance companies was that they were blindsided by the most documented liar who ever lived.

Number two that Lazarus acknowledges is the even more important fact that the ability to keep coverage was ALWAYS contingent upon meeting Obama’s “minimum standards.”  And contrary to Lazarus, it wasn’t merely “a big part,” it was THE CENTRAL PART.  The fact of the matter is that Obama had to drive people into his exchanges in order to ever have any hope of making the exchanges work.  Otherwise, only the older and sicker would enroll and ObamaCare would perish a slow, agonizing actuarial death spiral as the costs of coverage skyrocketed.  Which would plunge America into economic ruin as the most critical one-sixth of the U.S. economy became utterly paralyzed and dysfunctional and the people begin to panic.

We know that as early as July of 2010 the White House was fully aware of the fact that the president of the United States was lying to the American peopleWe now know that the political people at the Obama White House insisted that Obama keep saying something that everyone knew was false.

And it is simply asinine beyond the limits of asininity to suggest that anybody believe Obama had no idea what was going on.

To argue that Obama never comprehended the central component of his health plan is to claim that Obama is like the retarded boy who hung around a group of nuclear physicists and called himself part of the team but had absolutely no inkling whatsoever what the geniuses in the room with him were doing.  Obama frankly needs to be impeached either as the worst liar who ever torpedoed America or as the most incompetent fool who ever held public office.  Either way, this man simply has got to go.

Obama and his ObamaCare are sick jokes on America that simply have got to end.  Before they end America.

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